My Bettys Tour 2019 is fast approaching. After a short period of acclimatisation at the Doncaster base camp, where my fancy London ways will be thoroughly beaten out of me by my dad, I shall set off for a week of Yorkshire-style purification and self-discovery, stopping at Ilkley, Harrogate, Northallerton and York for elevenses and afternoon tea at every branch of Bettys, with a spot of sight-seeing thrown in for good measure. I'm hoping to see some of the many things that any self-respecting Yorkshireman should have seen by my age, but to be honest my main focus is on curd tarts, fat rascals, tea loaf, parkin and sandwiches, washed down with copious amounts of tea and coffee. There might also be the odd cream cake thrown in, and perhaps something containing custard.